I have just started my innings as a new driver. No doubt, with strict rules and everything, it is much easy, but I face pissed-off drivers way more than I had expected. Ok, I will be completely honest here, I get honked at. If it’s not me, It is someone else. I have seen so much hatred on the road, which in my opinion, is not only directed towards someone who does not know how to drive but an easy option to detoxify oneself. In other words, people litter their emotional garbage on others, even on the road.
The Zen story
There is a very popular Zen story about the two monks and a young woman. Two Buddhist monks, a senior monk, and a junior monk were walking through the forest. The came across a river flowing through their path. To continue their journey, they would need to swim through the river and cross to the other side.
There was a beautiful young woman who was sitting at the bank of the river. She did not know how to swim and requested the two monks to carry her on their back to the other side of the river.
Buddhist monks take a vow of celibacy. They are not supposed to even look at women, let alone carry them on their backs to the other side! The junior monk politely refused. On the other hand, the senior monk put the woman on his back, swam across the river, and dropped her safely to the other bank of the river – without saying a word. The junior monk was shocked at the behaviour of his fellow monk. He could not stop thinking about how his fellow monk had broken his vows by touching a woman.
They kept walking through the forest for an hour or so without a word between them. Then the junior could not resist and said to the senior monk – “Can I ask you a question?”. The senior monk said, “Sure go ahead.” The junior monk said – “I have been thinking about what you did at the river”. The senior monk said – “What did I do?” The junior monk said – “you broke your vows to Buddhism when you touched the woman while carrying her across the river and dropping her on the other side of the river.”
The senior monk laughed and said – “I dropped the woman on the bank of the river a long time ago! However, it seems that you are still carrying her around in your head!”
Let the past go!!
How simply this story gave a very powerful message. More than 50% of our thoughts wander in past. It is the reel of something we should/ should not have said, should/ should not have done that we play again and again in our minds in hoping to change the whole event. We are too emotional and we regret our past and try to change it. I am one of those people too, so are many of you. We are always dubious, always skeptical of our nature and carry others in our minds for days, even months to gain nothing later.
Is emotional baggage worth it??
There might be a gazillion things going on in your life right now. No matter how caught up you are, thousand of bitter thoughts cross your mind every minute, but, circumstances change, and so do people, for good or for bad. Here is one mantra I go by; everything won’t matter in a few years from now. So, why get emotional and dwell on the topic endlessly?!!
Forgive now, forget later.
Forgiving is the ultimatum path to peace of mind. Forgive others, forgive yourself, you will forget shortly. Our experiences with people are like choosing books in a library. Every book you open teaches you something. Some are interesting, some disappoint you whereas, some cheer you up. So, if you don’t like a certain book, do you burn it? No, you keep it aside and move on to the next one. The same is with people in your life. Ignore the bitter ones, cherish the sweet ones and learn from the wise ones.
I know it’s easier to say than to perform. I am a slow learner in the school of de-stressing too. But I have made a promise to myself to start with the small lessons. I hope the article will kick start the process of unloading extra baggage you have been carrying around apart from doing other things that need your attention right now!
I hope this will help you let go of the emotional baggage in your life. Cheers!!
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